Category: SATIRE
CARL COX TO ERASE DJ MAG 100 WINS FROM BIO WHEN MARTIN GARRIX COPS TITLE?
[wp_ad_camp_2] [wp_ad_camp_1] The quality of the list has been diluted by mainstream copycats and iPad promo teams Finally, this year MARTIN GARRIX is expected to win the DJ MAG TOP 100.
Read MoreA&R: SECRET TO SKRILLEX’ SUCCESS IS HIS BROKEN WASHING MACHINE (SHARE)
[wp_ad_camp_2] [wp_ad_camp_1] “Sonny grabbed Bieber and threw him in his washing machine. After one short cold wash cycle, he captured enough screams of agony to make something work” SKRILLEX is
Read MoreWINDOWS MEDIA PLAYER – NOT IBIZA – PRIME CAUSE OF KET AND MUSHROOM USE (SHARE)
[wp_ad_camp_2] [wp_ad_camp_1] When a lad from Nottingham posted a video of him taking shrooms while watching the Felix video, a widespread underground Windows Media Player drug culture originated. For years
Read MoreCLUBBER HAS DEEP PHILOSOPHICAL CHAT WITH LYFT SPAM BOT IN FB EVENT PAGE
[wp_ad_camp_2] “House is a feeling that no one can understand really unless you’re deep into the vibe of house.” [wp_ad_camp_1] A CLUBBER recently got into an in-depth philosophical chat when
Read MoreBURNING MAN ‘TOO SURVIVALIST’ FOR BEAR GRYLLS – CANCELS APPEARANCE
[wp_ad_camp_2] “After learning there is no luxury designer handbag store anywhere close, he cancelled the appearance.” [wp_ad_camp_1] BEAR GRYLLS, the world’s favorite survivalist cancelled a Burning Man appearance after
Read MoreDEADMAU5 USES FAMOUS HELMET TO KEEP EGO IN PLACE AT PERFORMANCES
[wp_ad_camp_2] “WHEN DEADMAU5 PLAYED SHOWS, HIS EGO GOT SO INFLATED HE NEEDED TO HAVE A LONG TERM SOLUTION FOR IT” [wp_ad_camp_1] DEADMAU5, arguably among the more talented people in EDM,
Read MoreATHEISTS WITH MEGAPHONES SHOW AT EDM FESTIVAL; TRY AND CONVERT BELIEVERS
[wp_ad_camp_2] [wp_ad_camp_1] “If god is a DJ, why are there so many shitty ones?” Yesterday at one of New York’s biggest EDM festivals, an unexpected MOB OF ATHEISTS with megaphones showed
Read MoreROOKIE BOUNCER REFUSES KLOCK AT BERGHAIN FOR LOOKING TOO CASUAL
[wp_ad_camp_2] [wp_ad_camp_1] With Klock in front of him in a blue shirt, wearing training pants and seeing how he completely skipped the line, laughing in the midst of a fairly
Read MoreSOURCE: MARSHMELLO TO SUE DJ ARSE SMELLO? (SHARE)
[wp_ad_camp_2] [wp_ad_camp_1] “I can’t mix for shit. Butt who cares? EDM is what I love and no one should be too anal about the technical aspects of it.” New on
Read MoreTRUMP: “MY BIGGEST SACRIFICE? LISTENING TO BLUE DA BA DEE, DA BA DA.”
[wp_ad_camp_2] [wp_ad_camp_1] “At the first notes, Donald cringed and thought the song to be horrible and of the worst kind” Caught in a world of backlash, DONALD TRUMP finally announced
Read MoreMARTIN GARRIX INVESTS IN UNIQUE SET OF PYRO-TECHNICS TURNTABLES
[wp_ad_camp_2] [wp_ad_camp_1] Whenever Martin is about to ignite the dancefloor with another floorburner, the turntables will throw 40 ft. high flames up in the air” In a bid to stay
Read MoreMEXICO TO FUND WALL TO PREVENT PISS POOR EDM FROM ENTERING THE COUNTRY
[wp_ad_camp_2] [wp_ad_camp_1] Juan del Carmen: “It will get a lot harder to visit our families stateside, but all for the greater good of preventing whack DJs and piss poor produced
Read MoreROLAND TO RE-RELEASE LEGENDARY TB 303 WITHOUT RESONANCE KNOB
[wp_ad_camp_2] [wp_ad_camp_1] JOKICHI TAMATEI: “WE DECIDED TO RE-RELEASE THE TB 303 WITHOUT RESONANCE KNOB SO IT COULD SOUND LIKE A BASS GUITAR AGAIN.” In light of the ongoing success of
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